Continued from Part 3
You are subconsciously telling I am weak. Subconsciously you are emitting a vibration telling that everything outside of me is powerful. I am helpless. That is what you will become. Not by what you say. By what you feel. You feel powerless. You will become powerless. You are always constantly giving your power to someone, something, something, something. To paths, saviours, families, societies, leaders, systems, religion, universities, ideals…
What will happen? You will remain powerless. That is how humans get controlled by all the system. Power is in this deep realisation. This deep awareness, beyond all programmings. That is where healing lies.
Do you see? We are slaves morning to evening. Helpless. That is why from morning to evening, from birth to death, we are simply moving around pleasing people. Do you see this? Check into this.
We are always scared. Whom will we hurt today? What will happen if this person gets disappointed? What will happen if that person gets angry? What will happen if this person, this place does not own me? There is a constant fear of rejection, isn’t it?
If you have that constant fear of rejection, then there are issues that you got to look into. You have given your power away. Programming. The world has taught you to remain that way. You have continued building your life based on that foundation. That is why today we feel helpless.
Today we don’t trust ourselves. We don’t have faith in ourselves. We don’t believe we can transform. We don’t believe we can self-realize. We want somebody else only to do that for us. We have become lazy.
Change perspectives. Because your healing begins in that change… in perspective first. Without that shift, that healing, there may not be reasonable improvement. You might do some progress, but again you will slip back. So I want to hit and nail that point, which is the root cause of all the problems. The mindset.
The perspective. Wrong perspective. Look into it.
Whenever somebody tries to tell you these things, what happens? People shrink. They withdraw. They defend. They justify. Have you seen that?
What are they justifying? Their beliefs. Why?
Because those beliefs have given them comfort, security. So one strongly believe this is my beautiful comfortable space of programmed beliefs. If somebody breaks it, my whole life of hard work, my lifelong investment will go.
The whole life is based on this. So that is where there is fear. That is why people can’t digest these kind of truths.
They have been programmed into belief systems. And I’m telling you, the world loves to give you beliefs because that is where the world gets its power. These things, nobody will tell you. Because if they will tell you, they’ll lose control of you. Programming is how they keep you, bound, always a follower, dependent, hooked.
When one moves towards becoming independent and self-reliant, what Shiva is teaching in Devi Kallotara to Parvati, systems can crumble. That is why Devi Kallotara are not even known in paths of Shiva. It breaks the orthodox, regular, patterned, programmed living in the matrix. These truths crumble systems.
Who will want no followers? When every system is trying to expand and spread its influence of dominance on the planet, building up empires, who will want no followers? Which system, which religion, which path doesn’t want followers?
All this can be constructed only on one weakness of humankind – weakness! Weakness of one not being able to trust oneself, for whatever reasons it may be.
Due to that weakness arises the need to please others. This weakness makes one an easy catch. Observe, this is where even in this world, one attracts those who make benefit out of you. With small offerings, you can be caught. One makes use of the one who is always trying to please. Use, later misuse, and then can grow into abuse!
One small word of assurance is enough for you to fall in love with me. Isn’t it? All I have to do is look lovingly at you and say. “Don’t worry, I am there for you.” That’s enough. Enough for the one who is seeking dependency, who wants someone else to handle their life. You surrender to that assurance. What is surrendering actually, is that helplessness, that dependency, that desperation, that hope… that someone will finally fix things for me.
You want that assurance from outside. That validation from outside. That validation may be given to you in the form of promised love, support, care, protection.
Because since childhood is the strong programming that support is always from outside, love is always from outside, acceptance is always from outside, healing is always from outside, direction is always from outside. In this bargain, one never ever gets an opportunity also to turn attention towards oneself. How can then one self-heal?
You can never heal. You will keep getting temporary breadcrumbs from this world. Sometimes this path will give you. Sometimes that teacher will give you. Sometimes this friend will give you. Sometimes that relationship will give you.
The moment any of these fail to give you what you have invested in them, see what happens. We shrink, isn’t it? One person in the home doesn’t listen to you. Doesn’t give you enough love. Doesn’t give you one attention. What happens? We shrink like a worm. Because they are not supplying you love.
Why should they supply to you love? Why should they give you attention? You have made a wrong investment. Because all your investments are everything outside, everything outside will surely perish. Your subconscious knows that well. So, there is a deep fear also lurking from inside despite all your faith in the outside. Because subconscious knows everything outside will sooner or later not be there. That is where the insecurity, anxiety, depression is coming from, which we often wonder why do we have it even when we have made all loyal investments. It is coming from here, the deep unconscious.
So, life remains busy in only maintaining these strings of attachments to all our life-long gathered investments. One string shakes, we shake. We rush to mend that string. Price is pleasing, compromising, even when things one compromises are not right. Exactly, like an abusive relationship where one bears through all the anxieties and confusions, and continues pleasing because the other has nowhere to go.
By the time you mend one investment string, another is shaking, and you rush there. Life goes on this way, only in adjusting, pleasing, praising, submitting, nodding, compromising. That is why we are tired, often even exhausted, even under that confidence that the mind has created to re-assure itself that clinging will keep it fine.
That is why the body is tired. The mind is tired. The life is tired.
All the time we are on the toes. Always on guard. There is no relaxation. Body is never relaxed. Mind is not relaxed. Constantly alert, brain is always in survival mode.
How can you rest? An alert nervous system can never rest. It is like the cat that is always awake. One small pin drop and it will feel danger. You look at the cat, its ears will be moving all the time. Tapping every single sound. It is in the survival mode. It is in the defensive mode. It wants to protect itself.
Because all the time it is scared. Something will happen to me. Something will happen to me. Same with us. There is a buried fear that something will happen, something may go wrong with the investments we are struggling to create and maintain.
Please understand. This is the catch of programmed beliefs. With the same belief itself you go into spirituality and paths. Not a big deal, its just the same old thing, now in a divine mask. I may call it divine but become deeply aware, you will it is just the same thing we are talking of here. In the world you call that clinging investment as a relationship and in spirituality you call it a divine relationship. Same vasanas, only in a different shade. In both cases, where is the relationship with yourself? Your Self?
Thus, we are never left to explore the source of all healing. Within. That space that you can never separate from. Because you are that space. That which has always been with you and will always be there. This is the space from where healing flows, because it is complete, the safest home, we always were in and never left, but mind made us feel out of it. That which is called as avidya or ignorance or Maya, due to which the mind rushes to grasp externally and desperately. The grace is is always flowing from this space but I have not been available to it.
Let’s see how to become available to that space, that grace, which is generated by me itself. Even grace that we thinks flows from outside to us, is actually produced inside us itself. Let us see what Shiva Sutras tell us in this regard.
…. to be continued
|| Excerpts from Jake Light’s TALKS ON AWARENESS
From the Healing Series
Comments are closed, but trackbacks and pingbacks are open.