We all have multiple personalities, some deliberate and some unconscious. A spiritual seeker is one who watches these personalities with the help of his expanded awareness. However confident you feel you don’t have a multiple personality, you do have.
Think… You are one personality at home with family, the moment you step out you are another, when you are on road you are another, when in office yet another, when with your boss completely another, in a meeting another, in a party fully another, in a train or bus another, in a church or temple another, while meditating another, in a shivir fully another, while alone you are the real you! Read it once again and while reading think how our thinking, attitudes, personalities, behavior, moods keep constantly changing to adapt to these situations and environment. We constantly project ourselves as ‘something’ in every environment to make ourselves safe, comfortable and “good” and unknowingly a personality has been created! Next time we come to similar situation and without any effort our personalities change to suit itself. This is because unknowingly we want to become good everywhere and thus to hide our flaws out outer appearance and personalities change.
That is why you will find yourself in a jinx if you boss, collegues, friends, family have to meet at a get-together! Why all this, just fix up a party with your school friend, college friends, locality friends, office friends, family friends, social friends, best friends, and facebook friends and see what a mess you will be in.. Because now it becomes so difficult to play all the roles at once! Who would be the most comfortable here? The one who is he or she everywhere. They will just be ‘normal’ even in such situations because they have lived as the same person everywhere with everyone and they have nothing to worry about. Forget group of friends, sometimes people are different with each and every individual, what a burden to carry!
So, which is real? I believe it’s the one which is totally alone with itself, with noone watching. When you are at home with not even your family around, you are the real you. Even if you become aware that one person from out of the window is watching you, you will change! Hypocrisy sets in. We behave what we are not and we live in the ignorant glory of these personalities believing “I am what I am” or “this is the way I am” or “I am cool” or “I am holy” or “I am a mess” or “I am bold” or “noone likes me” or “poor me” or “great me” and so on. So, who are the ones who are themselves everywhere. Currently, I can only think of saints or self-realized ones. They are the real “I am what I am” everywhere, every moment. What is in you will see it out and vice-versa. No camouflaging.
So, the real and true personality of an individual is the one which is alone with itself without anyone watching. In this position, you will notice that you will yawn freely, sit freely, be most comfortable even if you have not combed your hair or had a make-up, most comfortable with any kind of clothes or even with no clothes, you will scratch yourself anywhere with utmost liberty, dig your nose, gulp food, burp, fart, and do anything and everything that you really are. This is the real “I” .. Lol.. By the way, while reading a few above did you feel “yuck”? That’s the false “I” … Lol… Saints are those who carry this same personality even outside.
This is meaning to say that in spiritual growing, these false layers will have to be shed. Seekers on the path become aware of this falseness. How? With awareness. Just watch what all your mind does in all these different situations. Just this observation will make you constantly realize the “false I” which will slowly make you not do things which are not you! Hypocrisy will start declining. Pretension will start declining. Falseness will start declining. Ego will receive lesser fuel. Power of discrimination will increase. Awareness will increase. You will start becoming more connected to the “real I”. Sincerity and truthfulness will increase. Flaws will automatically start reducing. Simplicity will start setting in. So many things will simultaneously happen making this whole process an everyday sadhna in itself.
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